Wait a second…didn’t we just publish an article about how you could drink Starbucks every workday and still retire early. I’m sure you are all confused at this point. Well, luckily, I’m here to clarify it for you in case you didn’t gather it from the title. Starbucks is a huge waste of money.
That first article was a farce. I lured you in with the idea that you can still have your frivolous coffee and cut your working life years, or even decades, shorter. Everything in that article still applies, though. Working from the top-down regarding your spending will pay off multiples more than working from bottom up. But why not do both? Unmercilessly slash every overspent dollar and keep it for yourself.
Why Starbucks is a Waste of Money
Money Wasted on Starbucks
Now that you’re paying attention, let’s reiterate the math from the earlier article to help explain why Starbucks is a waste of money.
The average seasonal grande (medium) drink at Starbucks is $5.25. The average ticket for a single drink from a black coffee to a chai latte is between $3.45-$4.45.
For those that struggle with math, averaged out, this $4 daily coffee habit would cost you nearly $1,500 a year!
Alternatively, this money would accumulate to $16,200 in a decade if you invested it instead of spending it.
Also, this isn’t counting the time committed, or the wear and tear on your car driving to and sitting at the Starbucks drive-through. You gotta cut that shit out if you are wanting to say goodbye to the W-2 world anytime before 60.
Time Wasted on Starbucks
It’s not just the direct money lost from it. Everyone’s heard the age-old saying ‘time is money’, right? Well, that’s especially true here so we are going to break down the moments of your life lost here.
Let’s assume that it takes you 2 minutes to divert from the quickest route to work and get in the drive-through, and another 5 minutes in the drive-through ordering and waiting on your coffee. 7 minutes a day sounds like nothing. 35 minutes a week x 52 weeks = 30 hours. So at this point, you have spent $1,040 and 30 hours of your life in a single year.
Don’t forget the stress induced by this whole fiasco of getting a to-go coffee on the way to work.
You’re rushed for work and about to ram the idiots in front of you with your car because they aren’t going fast enough. You are about 200 mg of caffeine and 30 seconds away from going on a killing spree. You like to think that you’d be doing them a favor. Massacring every person in this hellhole seems like a courtesy at this point.
Just take a deep breath and think about all the jail time you would get for becoming an arsonist and turning this place into an inferno…and no, you can’t make it seem like an accident. Your time should be worth more to you than that, I know mine is. To sum up this section, Starbucks is a waste of money and time.
Health Wasted on Starbucks
Now, let’s turn a corner and discuss how it’s draining your wallet while filling up your clothes.
First off, you aren’t buying a cup of coffee anymore at Starbucks. They hardly even offer coffee. Instead, you’re buying a coffee-flavored dessert. Sugar is even more addictive than coffee. However, when you can combine the two, you’ll have people fiending for their next fix.
Let’s say it’s warm out and you want to get an “Iced Caffe Vanilla Frappuccino” (genuinely, it pained me to type this). Well, that’s a whopping 500 calories.
Oh, now it’s cold out and you just HAVE to get a warm drink. How about a “Salted Caramel Mocha”? Tack on another 500 calories. According to the Google machine, in 2017 the average American woman is 5’4″ and 166 lbs. She needs 1,449 calories per day to maintain her weight. (Update: as of 2019 the average woman is over 170lbs)
If she has three even meals per day, that coffee was more than her breakfast. If she gets her base rate of 1,449 calories per day + the coffee, she will gain 1 lb every week and a half. A total of 39 lbs in a year. This 166 lbs woman has just ballooned up to 205 lbs just by adding a Starbucks “coffee” to her diet.
Do you remember the stress mentioned earlier? Imagine how stressed you are at this point, you’re fat and broke! You’ve lost over $1k, 30 hours, and gained 39 pounds….in what world does this trade-off make sense? Why in the hell are you still torturing yourself by going to this place?
I’m not here to only point out the problems though, I also come bearing a remedy. The solution to this problem that plagues most American’s: make your coffee at home. Better yet, make your coffee at work. Not only is it free, but I’m “working” and it’s completely permissible.
Let’s say, hypothetically, that you choose the more expensive of these options and you make your coffee at home. First off, check out our Guide to DIY Coffee at home to be sure you’re using the best method for your preferences.
Amazon has a 24 oz jug of Folgers. This bucket of ground coffee makes 210 cups. For less than the cost of 2 of your overpriced sugar-laden coffees you could have a cup every day for 7 months. Sure, you have to buy the filters or get a reusable one. Even after adding those in, your cup o’ joe is setting you back less than 7¢.
This brings us to the next point. We’ve covered how to make it cheaper, now let’s make it healthier.
Drink your coffee black. Not only is it cheaper, but this simple step will transform it from a sugar-laden drink destined to pack on the pounds into a cheap and effective fat burner. Studies have shown that a cup of black coffee can boost your metabolism by 11%.
Ironically, every coffee snob that scoffed at the idea of drinking Folgers probably doesn’t even know what coffee tastes like anymore. Why are you buying expensive coffee just to overpower the flavors with sugar and creamer, again?
Ditch the useless status symbol of having an overpriced cup of coffee. I promise that no one cares whether your cup has a logo on it or not. Everyone is just falling prey to mindless consumption and the narcissism of showing off that you can afford to pay $6 for a 10¢ cup of “coffee” filled with sugar, milk, and caramel. Cut out the overpriced coffee and you can keep your money, your time, and your physique.